si_love2@hotmail.com

Do you remember the girls jumping double-dutch and playing jacks on the front porch or the boys playing football and running that basketball up and down the court? I long to hear their laughter. Their innocence is gone. They are no longer dreaming dreams because they live in the nightmare of this reality. Because Daddy is gone and Momma is working 2 jobs, teachers don’t care, and the neighbors mind their own business now a day. What happened to the African Proverb, ‘it takes a village to raise a child?’ The village is now in an uproar and Our Children are raising themselves. What happened to the neighborhood centers that use to keep Our Children safe after school? Oh, I forgot the politicians promised them funding but the programs got the ax during to last budget cut. Now you see red and blue banners waving from pockets or wrapped around heads. Our children are wearing them like badges of honor, the tell tale sign that the gangs are taking over and if Our Children wear either color they will end up dead.
Mothers and Fathers I must ask:
“Do you know where your Child is?”

I had a talk with God the other day
GOD: He told me, if you know what’s good you’ll change your ways
ME: But everything I do is not the right thing
GOD: That’s because you haven’t yet accepted the things that life may bring
ME: But just think, what people will say if they know what’s on my heart
GOD: But child, I created you, you’re my work of art
I made you to have a strong soul no matter what you go through
And yet you continue to take actions that satisfy people and never you
ME: So how come everything is the wrong thing to do
GOD: That’s easy he says, try this, live your life being true
ME: What about the experiences and tribulations that burden me
The troubles flow down, they never seem to cease
GOD: My child, trust in me, I’ll never steer you wrong
Follow your true feelings and it will be easier to move along
ME: Okay lord, I believe you with everything in me
Take control of me, lift me high where I long to be
I have accepted what I could never help
I won’t mind what others say, I love myself
Let’s see where this leads me in this cold cruel world
Thank you for this talk, I no longer feel like a lost little girl

When I argue and yell at the top of my lungs so loud
It’s because I’m so angry inside from not making you proud
When I shed tears that seemingly keep falling
It’s because I’m so down I’m no longer walking but crawling
When I rock back and forth and shake tremendously
It’s because the nightmares from my past haunt me endlessly
When I smile from ear to ear and seem full of love
It’s only because I’m thankful for another day from the man up above
When I shut down and lie about the things I used to do
It’s because you’ll judge me if you know what’s really true
But when I think about one day… I never want to lose you
What would I have, who would I turn to
My life would end, there’s no need to pretend
Mommy don’t go, you’re my only true friend

Maybe if you made things more, clear I wouldn’t ask questions
If you spoke up more, I wouldn’t make so many suggestions
If you tried a little harder, I wouldn’t push you
If you encouraged me more, going forward wouldn’t be an issue
If you reached out to me more, I wouldn’t have to dive in
Maybe we can start all over again…
Maybe if I shut up sometimes, I’d hear you
And yeah, I shouldn’t get upset at a lot of the things you do
If I wasn’t so paranoid and so insecure
We’d definetly learn to love each other even more
If I checked my own attitude over and over again
We would only have arguments every now and then
But for right now, I want to know you won’t break my heart
Maybe if I stopped thinking that this, realtionship could start

My sistas, my sistas, where do we stand?

Do we stand by the grave
Of the love that has passed away
As you hope and pray
That one day he will again see your face

Or do we stand by the man
Whose hateful hands
Has caused the pain the he himself once began
And while he’s out fuckin’ some girl named Ann
From your face the blood has ran

Tell me, do we stand on the street
Passing out your treasures like lunch meat
Steady trying to get on your feet
But on the bed he holds you down like concrete
Trying to rise but you’re in too deep

Or do we stand in the local club
Dressed like some video hoe trying to impress some wannabe thug
Loosing your dignity just to gain a dub
As he deprives you of respect and you mistake it for love

Or do we stand in front of the mirror sucking in all you are worth
Crying cause on the outside you don’t look like her
Not realizing that true beauty is an eternal gift that is given at birth
And can’t be molded or shaped like the women in Glamour

Or my sistas will you stand and shout with all your might
To stop the wrong and try to get the shit right
Because if we go on at this rate destruction is in sight
And I don’t know about you, but I wasn’t sent here to destroy, I’m here to fight

So my sistas, my sistas, I will ask you again, where do we stand?

My brothas, my brothas, when will you step in?

Will you step in when the baby you once knew as your own
Is lying there on the corner all alone
With one fatal bullet through his dome
Cause you were never there at home
To give him guidance but now he’s gone

Or will you step in when all the parties have died down
And all the cryst’al and Bentleys are no longer found
And all the girls around town
Won’t speak a sound
Because you’re nothing but a bum now

Tell me, will you step in when death comes knocking at your door
Because of some set you’ve claimed before
But your homies aint there any more
And you’ve lost your last war
As you lay dying there on the floor

Or will you step into that lonely jail cell
Because of the deadly temper you’ve thrust upon the woman in the wedding veil
And it’s easy to tell
You’ve lost your freedom as you walk down the gates of hell
And as your children sit watchin you realize your attempt to become a man has failed

Or will you step into that hospital room
As your body disintegrates into that fatal doom
And the Grim Ripper moves closer whistling his famous tune
Because you’ve been careless with your body, there aint nobody else to blame but you
As the disease known as AIDS has taken over and your final hour approaches too soon

Or my brothas will you step in when the fate of the black man
Has been reduced to the battles fought across East and West coast land
And the accomplishments of the Million Man March is now on the second hand
Because before you can strive for a better place for you to stand
You gotta continue to fight over who was behind the deaths of 2pac and Biggie over and over and over again

So listen up because I don’t think you quite comprehend that in order to protect our future, my brothas, now is the time for you to step in

Last night I spoke to you and you gave me the answer to my most desired question
You released my curiosity
The essence of your imaginary kingdom filled my soul with doubtful awareness
Yet my mind is free
Thank you, I say unto the being that entrapped my perfectionistic ways
I owe you a deal of gratitude for curing me of disbelief

Why haven’t you come before
As I needed you then
That night when I was nailed to the floor trapped and brutalized
He trusted into my soul and I shouted
For you
But you never came

That day when the tower tried to take from me what was mine
A howl to the moon a mother’s cry
On my knees I begged and pleaded
It was you I needed
But you never came

Those hours of pure hate as my face took blame for his misfortunes
Battered and torn I stood and walked again
Yet the shine of silver stood in my path
Once again to take his wrath
I whispered for you
But you never came

A quick reaction a blind distraction and I feared
The laughter stopped and life began to play
Strapped in I plunged into the wall
It was on you that I called
But you never came

But here tonight, no worries, no sorrow, no danger appears
Calm and collect the strength of my virtues keep me warm
Under the covers sheltered from the storm
I realize you were there all along
As I sleep and you speak
In my dreams a conversation takes aim
And then you came

Out on the plains I caress you in my hand deserted by the feeling of sadness
Mesmerized by the look of you I know what I must do
In a sense of longing I hold you close once more vowing never to forget each drop of lustful entity
A tear sheers down my face in hopes like I to escape the torture of regret
But yet
This is the road I must follow

In my mind I recite the last moments we captured in our world
The burn of passion that slid down my throat as I embraced you
Trying to control the beat of each sway of my hips
I stood there and sipped
Never letting go of the taste of the desire that once filled me in those fanatic nights
I loose emotion and my thoughts slip away just like the day of you and I
I cry
Once more I yearn for another chance but no this is the path I deny

In three I hold you high so that the gods above can touch you with ease
Covering you with the golden allure of purity
Two I stretch you out in front of me measuring the distance between us
Which by the way is reason to believe we are here
Now one just one last time I wrap you around me breathing out the fear of my choice
Never will I endure such pain like the one set upon me now
Released into the air a breeze of closure pushes me aside
I hide
For I know I want to catch you one last time

The clock passes and the plains call once again
A wind like no other drifts towards the free
Squinting I see
You’ve comeback to me
Like the boomerang you were set out be.

Ma’s soul is callused
self esteem bruised
and heart numbed
from the constant carvings
by Daddy’s razor tongue

He sharpened it nightly
and soaked it in alcohol
sliced open deep wounds
that left mental scars

From what I’ve witnessed
words hurt more than fists
His swing was a mighty one
His words never missed

I don’t think he realized
just how much pain he caused
I don’t think he ever cared
He just wanted to control her
with angry words
and threatening stares

I don’t know
what he said last night
but that fight
really pissed Ma off
This morning
Daddy woke up
with a gun in his mouth
and Ma blew his tongue right off

copyright Berthony Poux
www.soulofbrooklyn.com

When I’m in your spot and I ask you
“What’s my name?”
It’s not to see if I got you hot
It’s not to brag, It`s not to boast
It’s just quite simply that I forgot

I need you to remind me
Who am I? Who are you?
And how did we ever survive apart?
Right now we feel so connected
Like the blood that races through my veins
was pumped from your heart

We got a love that even time can’t test
Yes, this is that kind of love that lasts
Your eyes are windows to my future
that look with understanding on my past

From the beginning of existence
our souls were bound
Each lifetime Fate’s persistence
made sure true love was found
Each time that I’m born,
I’m lacking something
And each lifetime
you are exactly what I need
You are the wind in my sails
You are the air that I breathe
You are my sun
that burns away the clouds of loneliness
Allowing me to see love clearly
Each lifetime our souls reunite stronger
Causing me to love you more dearly

But if I leave you tomorrow
Don’t let sorrow consume your heart
By definition Soul Mates can never truly be apart
Look in the mirror…I’m there
See me in your eyes
Live with me in your heart
Until we meet again….next lifetime

copyright 2001 Berthony Poux
www.soulofbrooklyn.com