all the thinking of wanting you here

sometimes becomes hurtful

the thoughts the smiles

i have pictured so many, many times

is it truly next year

for you ane me

i wonder i wonder

will i get to see you the beautiful person you really are

will i understand who you are to me

will i understand who i am to you

life is confusing now

and there have been days where i’ve wanted you here

sometimes i think you won’t like me

sometimes i think i won’t be good enough for you

where am i going

our my steps leading to you

am i going in circles

that seems like what my dreams tell me

being surrounded is what i always wanted

and now , that feeling no longer remains

always wanting to be apart

but now no longer, no longer do i wish to remain

apart of , among, or in between

it was what i thought i needed to be happy

but i was wrong

watching it from afar made me cry

because that’s how much i really wanted to be apart

this word i do not understand

because i do no even consider my self a friend

i don’t know what it means

to be a friend

sharing, caring, smiling, laughing

is that what its really all about

somethings i saw far away

made me want to stay away

feeling the need to protect my heart

feeling the need to protect what’s left of me

i guess you just have to take the good with the bad

i guess it won’t always be what you want and imagined